If you should find yourself in need of a shot of methotrexate, you should know that when Dr. Google describes it as intramuscular, he means in your ass. So don’t go in thinking that it’s going to be in your arm or anything delicate like that.
Also, it most likely means two shots in your ass.
Also, if your practitioner tells you to bend over so she can deliver said shots in the ass, you should not pull your pants down. She means the very top of your ass, in an area you may never have thought of as even part of your ass, and if she turns around to find you have your pants around your knees you will feel like… an ass.
I hate the word ass.
If you are not too traumatized by the idea of having a pregnancy that could have killed you (not that mine got anywhere near that far) and you can live with a 10-20% chance of recurrence and would like to try again, you must wait, not for the return of one real period, as after a “normal” miscarriage, but through an ovulatory cycle and a second period, because apparently methotrexate fucks up the next egg in line.
Finally, if you are looking for something to give your blog stats a spike, there’s nothing better than a good pregnancy drama. And it really does help when times are bad to know that the innernets care. Thanks again for being here.
Edited to add: It is a good idea to demand that your doctor give you a “just-in-case” prescription of Zofran before you leave. And if you don’t have a 24 hour pharmacy near you, it’s a good idea to fill it before closing time, just in case. I will not puke. I will not puke. I will not puke. Oh, lordy.
