You guys are the best January 28, 2008

I forgot how much you know how to rally around a girl when the going gets tough. I appreciate all of your support. Unfortunately, the news, she is not good. I’m up to a medium-flow period level of blood accompanied by intermittent cramping.

My OB’s office is so nice– my favorite nurse offered to get me in for an ultrasound this afternoon, but my schedule was packed and I knew an ultrasound at five weeks wouldn’t show anything conclusive anyway, so I’m going for a beta in the morning. Now I’m kind of just hoping for a definitively low beta tomorrow so I can leave off the progesterone for good and just get this over with.

If I were at my old job, even if I’d just taken a vacation, I would have felt comfortable taking a day or two off, but with the new job, not so much. I’ve worked with people that have one (often good) excuse after another for not working and I don’t want to be one of them. Sometimes I got distracted by my meetings today, but sometimes I was sitting there screaming on the inside, “I’m miscarrying right now! Right this very second!” It’s so weird to think that the cells that might have been a baby ended up in the office toilet and garbage can.

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